Last year, Mr. HalfFull and I embarked on our 30/40 World Tour: Quest for Passion. But it all came to an end 10 weeks later, and we returned to the real world of jobs and schedules.
Our sailing adventure in Fiji was nothing like that of Robin Lee Graham. I prefer to take airplanes between countries.
A few months ago, I read Dove, the true story of a 16-year-old boy who sailed around the world. My trip was nothing like the solitude he experienced on his sailboat, but the wanderlust and thrill of adventure on land are similar. During his journey, he met his wife, Patti. This passage about her really struck me; it reminded me of my writing here and thoughts as my journey was coming to an end:
There are gaps in Patti’s diary, which was written to remind her of days that meant much to her. She knew as I knew that we had got too close to heaven too early, that our time in the islands must come to an end; that we would soon have to return to the real world again.
One day I noticed that she had stopped typing. She had put the typewriter back in the locker where she had found it. I asked her why, and she smiled and said, “I don’t want to write the last chapter.”
Well this is the last chapter and it’s been written, like it or not. As they say, all good things must come to an end. But the memories will last a lifetime. Perhaps those memories will continue to inspire me, and help me on future quests.
Recently, I was telling a friend about my Quest for Passion. He stared at me incredulously and asked why I had to travel to find my passion. I explained that travel wasn’t required, but it’s a good way to get out of normal routines and change thought patterns. If you are in the same place, with the same schedule, interacting with the same people, you are less open to new possibilities. But when you throw yourself into new environments, you are forced to make it work and challenge yourself in different ways.
Mr. HalfFull practicing mental relaxation and flexibility. But he doesn’t need as much practice as much as Ms. HalfEmpty!
This is part of the reason why vacations are so important. They help to free your mind from chores at home, and give you the opportunity for mental relaxation and flexibility. Stay-cations can be useful to accomplish projects at home, but they don’t have the same freeing power as getting away and changing your environment.
We are generally creatures of habit. Many of us say we like change, but change can be hard. Perhaps we like the idea of change, but the work to get there isn’t always enjoyable.
I think the Quest for Passion is lifelong for many of us who are not innately drawn to something. My trip is over, but I think my quest will continue. Patience is not one of my virtues, so I need to learn to appreciate the journey and live my way into my answers.
…have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer…
I hope you stick around to find out what life is like after the 30/40 World Tour. Or perhaps you have found my passion, the key to the locked room, or can translate the very foreign language for me. If so, let me know in the comments. Living my way into the answer seems like it could be very frustrating!
- When your trip nears the end, do you worry about writing the last chapter?
- Has travel helped you think in different ways?
- Are you a creature of habit or spontaneity?
- Have you found your passion? Was it a struggle or did it come naturally?
- Are you patient?
#1 by Kathleen on September 26, 2012 - 9:47 PM
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There is never one answer. Maybe that is why I never liked the multiple choice questions. It locked me into a straight jacket and I always felt constrained in my thinking that way. I grew up in a culture where you express yourself in your writing and where you answer questions with full statements and no guessing! Anyway, the questions are often more interesting than the answers
I am looking forward to following you in your post travel blogs. I love travel, vacation and free thinking!
#2 by Ms. HalfEmpty on September 26, 2012 - 10:15 PM
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I think there are good answers and bad answers. A short list of choices helps focus thinking; otherwise an infinite list of possibilities could be overwhelming. And feeling overwhelmed can lead to analysis paralysis and inaction. Sometimes we need a nudge in the right direction.
#3 by Sarah P. on September 27, 2012 - 9:12 AM
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I love that Rainer Maria Rilke quote. I think his point is that you can’t focus on living the answers. You have to just live the questions, with patience and hope. It reminds me of the term “negative capability,” that ability to be okay without having everything defined and figured out. It’s hard, and feels messy. It also leaves much more room for beauty and mystery.
Also, I think that passions can change. Sure, there may be one or two overarching themes in a person’s life, about what their talents and interests are. But you can also have smaller passions that change with the seasons of life.
Right now, writing poetry is my passion. It feels like it will be life-long, because it was something I loved as a child, too—right up through college. So it feels like returning to something that’s very much myself. But I hesitate to make any big claims, because I’ve seen myself change, and who knows? Maybe I will go back to being passionate about painting. And coming back to poetry happened BECAUSE OF struggle. I had several intensely difficult years, with three very young kids and a chronic health problem. So I needed a pressure valve.
I absolutely agree with you that the Quest is lifelong. Perhaps one of the keys to it is finding a way to enjoy the actual questing, so as to take pleasure in it even though there’s still the discomfort of not having arrived at a “destination.”
#4 by Ms. HalfEmpty on September 27, 2012 - 9:44 AM
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I’m glad the quote resonated with you too! It’s really hard for me to be okay with a messy life; I crave order and meaning. Sometimes I just want direction and have exhausted patience and hope.
Thanks for sharing your perspective on changing passions. It’s interesting that you reconnected with yours through struggle. That doesn’t give me much hope either!
I guess I’ll have to try to enjoy this circuitous half empty quest…
#5 by Mr. HalfFull on September 27, 2012 - 9:20 PM
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I’ve always been paradoxically happy when I don’t want to return home from a trip, because in my mind that feeling is simply the residue of a worthwhile excursion. Cheers to living our way into the answer! <3
#6 by Ms. HalfEmpty on September 28, 2012 - 8:50 AM
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I guess as an optimist, your happiness about the worthwhile excursion outweighs your dread at returning to the real world. Hum…not sure the half empty camp is quite there. =)